[update: we've found a more recent picture

of the Malayan Pit Viper: - AwesomeThom]

Dear Enlightened Readers,

I am writing from my covert command center and using every possible means (including free tea and coffee) to bring you this latest report.

Sources high in the station of ultimate supreme secrecy of very secret sources reports that:

"Doctors around the world, including in Virginia Beach, are testing the venom of Malayan Pit Vipers as medicine to treat stroke patients. One bite from a Malayan Pit Viper can cause your heart to race, your face to go numb and your body to bleed uncontrollably. Medical experts say that if the Malayan Pit Viper were to bite you, you would bleed to death and die. On the other hand, some medical experts believe the same venom, once purified and diluted, can save you from some debilitating effects of a stroke."

Watch out. They spread fear to spread the terror that eventually terrorizes you and then out of fear you become afraid! That is when they get you! With their 'purified and diluted' mind-control juice! Once they get the potion in your head you become a zombie and do their bidding. Avoid all Malayan Pit Vipers and all Malayians for that matter not to mention Doctors and Virginians. They cannot be trusted!

You have been warned!!!

~SPECIAL UNIT - 369258A